God Blindfolds Us

The problem is that we cannot see the road ahead – we have no option but to have faith, trust. We do not know what will happen next or how things will happen. When we are not able to see a road, the mind brings all the negative.

There comes a time, when we do not see anything ahead. A problem is nothing but our inability to see ahead. we call it a problem.

When we are not able to see anything ahead, we should not be scared or tensed but be happy as we should know that God has taken over. She will guide you accordingly. One should worry when one is able to see, it is not God’s path. It is our path. When God is guiding our way, She blindfolds us. We become blind and get scared. The fear is because we have been blindfolded by God. When we cannot see outside, the mind, the internal takes over, it scares us. It generates great fear. The fear is the proof that we have been blindfolded by God. We must know that she is with us and should not fear.

For me God is no other than Goddess Kali.

God path always leads to greatness, it is huge, full of glory and beyond imagination. No human path can lead us there.

Whenever we are not able to see ahead, we should know that God has taken over and we should relax as it is never the wrong path.

No quicker path than doing nothing

The path does not reveal itself to me hence there is a tendency to act or find a path. 

I do not see the path – because I am on it. It is not separate from me.

I realized that I am already on the path – there is no need to search for another. 

Every action of mine is an attempt to go on another path or speed up this path, which is nothing but another path. 

My actions are thwarted. 

An enlightened man cannot change his path. I cannot change my path. 

An ordinary man changes but comes back, thus his path lengthened. 

An enlightened man is in the shortest path, hence his actions do not bear result – to not make him deviate from the shortest path. An action, whether it bear results or not, only lengthens the path. The path is shortest when no action is attempted.

Being enlightened, I am on my shortest path too. My actions do not bear results either. 

His path is shortest and quickest when he does nothing. His actions bear results only if it does not increase the length of his path. 

My path is shortest and quickest when I do nothing at all.

For me, there is no quicker path than doing nothing at all. 

But, the path does not reveal itself to me. 

The path does not reveal itself to me

My life has a path, but I am not aware of it. 

The path does not reveal itself to me. It is the nature of the path. 

My mind can no longer decide or come up with a great path – it creates but the awareness rejects it. So it goes for the worst. The awareness rejects the worst path as well, leaving a void.

The mind and the path have been separated.

What I feel is emptiness. 

I do not know where I am going. 

The path does not reveal itself to me. 

There is a path, but I am unaware of it

There is a path, but I am unaware of it. 

I cannot be made aware of it. It is the nature of things.

Hence, for me, everything is a “No”, everything is negative. 

Always saying “this is not it”.

The mind shows the consequences of this No

It causes fear. 

…

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But there is a path, I am unaware of it. 

Whose Path?

It is the path laid by God that will make the difference and not the path we choose for ourselves.

Nothing is final: Neither the Good nor the bad

The mind is not final. If the mind knows it, it is not the path. If it is in the mind, it is not the purpose.

After my enlightenment, I could never say – “OK. I have found the path. This is it. Now I will walk”.

The path will always remain unknown. Nothng is final. This is because now I am no one to decide on a path. The moment I say “Ok. this is it”, I am trying to come to a conclusion.

This is also applicable to all the fearful thoughts I get. They are not the path either. They are not final. I cannot conclude that “Now, I am in trouble, this is the dreadful path I have to walk”.

Nothing is final.

Causality & Path

I cannot be certain of any path. There is tremendous resistance in choosing a path and moving forward. My attempts have failed in the past – all of them. Since they do not work out, they are not the path.

Thus I am not aware of a path. I don’t know what to do.

If I knew the path, the path would be the cause and I the effect.  But since I am out of cause and effect, I don’t know my path. This is the reason why I do not have a path.

It is as if I have not started at all. But I started long ago – but was not aware of it. 

I don’t know where I am being led to.

If I know it, it is not the path. All the negatives that I fear might happen, are not the path. There is nothing to fear. 

If I knew it, I would do it and it would not make the required impact. I am a human.

If the universe does it, it would make a tremendous impact – but it would never let me know. The universe is using me as a vessel. 

Soliloquy 1

I have been trying to finish it (do away with my fear) in one go. It will never work out this way.

Will this fear ever go? Where is this question coming from?

What is it that I am missing? I see that my fear goes if I get to hear that a path that will solve this problem of fear. 

I get a feeling that it can be solved, because hearing about a path, the fear subsides.

Am I looking for a path?

Or if I do it everyday, it will not come. But I have to do it everyday. 

But what do I do? Can I decide that?

Worship Kali. I have to do it till I am alive.

The more I am giving myself a path the fear is going away – am I seeking a path?

A path but not a result and a timeline.

But one thing I know, the path should not end.

Or It is indefinite. One day it will go, but I do not know when. 

Or if I keep worshipping, trouble will be gone – one day they will all be clear.

But how many days it will take is unknown. But it is bound to go away.

Is this a way of surrender?

There should be no end to it. If the number of days are counted, one would expect results.And I know it will not work out for me. 

The fear is because I am not surrendering. Or I have surrendered but my actions are not commensurate with it. My actions must also change with this. Somehow I have been holding this. This is not happening. 

Surrender is when you see yourself as vulnerable, alone and seek support. Surrender is when you ask but you do not know when it will be given. You keep asking as without it, it is very difficult to live. 

I have been doing it, but I quit as I want to finish it on the same day using my mind. That is why it has not worked out. 

After getting this path, I am feeling better. But I know that the moment I put a timeline, things will fall apart.

I have to wait for Kali Mata to bless me and when she will, I do not know. 

The enlightened man is the starting point

An enlightened man never finds a cause of which his actions will “be an effect”. He has no driving force. There is no pull. There is a complete lack of purpose. That is why he keeps waits for someone to tell him and takes the mind as the signpost. Mind is not an ordinary signpost, but a sinster signpost.

He will receive no answer if he asks “If he is on the right path”. He can never convince himself that he is on the right path, no matter what he does. 

Whatever the enlightened man wishes to do, he will never find a cause to do it, or a purpose or a driving force that will prompt him to do it. There is no reason why he should do it. 

Because, he is the cause. He is the starting point. 

While for an ordinary man, existence is the cause, the mind is the effect and since the mind is connected to the physical body, the mind becomes the cause of which the physical body is a reaction. 

Freedom is Scary

It is only as if I only the mind to look up to. I look up to the mind because I am seeking a path and the only thing that is available is the mind. 

Why am I seeking a Path?

After enlightenment, I have become directionless. I am seeking a path as I have been abandoned by the mind. I have been set free. Suddenly I am free and it is scary since I have not experienced this in the past. Earlier this path was not required as I was not free and connected to the mind. The mind pulled.

That I am seeking a path & scared proves that I have attained enlightenment. I have become free. 

It seems to me that what is now available to me is only the mind. Even if other paths are available, I am not used to looking at them, but only the mind. I have been used to it as earlier there was no choice, but to be the effect of which the mind is the cause – both the physical body and the mind were connected. I am afraid because suddenly I am free and I take the mind as the only support for direction.  But it gets more scary as in the mind all things happen that would happen if I am absent. The mind is a reaction of the cause, which is this external world. Hence it is scary. It scares me. 

The mind has always been there and will always be there, but now I am no longer in it. I have left it. So in it, all those things happen that would happen if I am not there – things would start to fall apart. This scares me.

As I started to become free, the mind started to emerge.  And when I became completely free, the mind was also set free. (If I am Neo, the mind personified is Agent Smith).

Since I am free, I can walk my own path. I am no longer the effect of the cause, which is the mind, which itself is the effect of the cause, which is existence.

I can now carve out my own path. I am no longer reliant on the mind. I must stop looking at it. Ignore it completely. For this I have to have another path. Another direction – which will not be someone else’s, but my own path, which is not a reaction or a purpose set by another, but my own wish. 

I have to create a parallel to the mind and start looking at it, rather than the mind.