Experience Enlightenment
I had a goal – I have given up
I had a timeline to meet – I have given up
I an growing old – I don’t know
Now Nature has a goal for me – but I don’t know what it is
Nature decides the timeline
Nature decides how fast I should run
Whether I should run or walk or do nothing
There is fear as I give up control
But I still wait
I know when my rate of change is my own and not borrowed, everything will fall into place
Why the trouble?
Why the fear? Others will do what I want to do.
Others will achieve what I want to achieve.
But I cannot be replaced. My work can be replaced.
The question is who am I?
What is the importance of me?
How do I define myself? Do I have a definition?
What is the uniqueness that is impossible to replace or defeat?
My spontaneity is unique. The way I respond to a “call” is unique.
How often I respond to a call is unique – the rate.
It cannot be taught.
Let Nature make me because I am unique.
Nature makes me who I am.
Nature makes me unique.
Let nature call, and I will respond.
Nature calls as per my rate of change – my rate of change is unique to me.
If I allow nature to change me, it will make me change as per my unique rate.
My rate of change is unique.
How do I deduct my work from me?
Let my work be very little?
Let there be no work but only response.
Response at a rate that is unique to me.
If there is no call, I will do nothing in particular.
One’s true nature is the rate at which he, she or it changes with time.
Everything in this universe has its true nature – rate of change as per their true nature. Everything in this universe has a different rate of change – A tree takes decades to grow, a bee flaps its wings 200 times a second, a horse runs fast, mountains change in millions of years – according to their true nature. Humans are also different – they have their own true nature. If one is not changing as per its true nature, it will cease to exist and be born again to match its true nature. In an extreme case, he or she either dies, or adheres to his true nature – it is a shift – one gets enlightened.
Whatever detours I have been forced to take were for me to match my rate of change. My rate of change makes me unique as the rate of change is different for everyone.
Almost 99.99% of people change together – because they follow the chronological clock – the crowd, they move how the crowd moves. Only 0.01% change as per their nature and thus they become visible – their uniqueness comes to the surface – they look different. Whole world has been made to follow a clock and they change, not as per their true nature, but as per the chronological clock.
Now I am changing as per my true nature. There is nothing to do. It will automatically change. Whenever I go fast, I am brought back. So, I should not try to go fast.
Whatever happens, all detours, if they all happen, will happen to slow me down to make me match my true nature.
I should not even try to find my calling
Everything looks so fallible
Nothing is concrete
Things look impossible.
I am losing interest
Always in searching mode
I guess to search and never find is the norm – while the journey is on
There is no path to accomplishment
As, I don’t know what is to be accomplished
I don’t know from where money will come
Nothing draws my interest any more
Nothing can be forced on me
I cannot force anything on anyone
The past and present has become one
I have realized that I am beyond all titles and little praises that people seek. I am also above being the richest man in the world because I know that even after being the richest man, I would still keep searching.. be dissatisfied..
Nothing satisfies me. I am attracted to nothing.. I chase nothing – I have outgrown everything, I have reached the pinnacle.
Now there is nothing to plan or do.
At enlightenment, I am standing at he edge of a cliff. I reached here walking. Earlier, at every point, there was something to step on to, but now there ia nothing.
Now everything is behind me. The past is behind me. Ahead is the final fall into nothingness. One can fall anytime and hence the fear. There is a great fear of falling as there is nothing ahead, nothing to put a step on.
As everything is going into the past, there is a feeling that I am going into the future, but the future is a fall for me – hence great fear.
The falling off from the cliff is called Mahaparinirvana.
Can I call it mine?Why can I not call it mine?What is stopping me? What is the definition of calling it mine? What is the criteria?
Only when others label it as mine?
Or when there are possibilities.
Now, when there are no possibilities, the other is needed.
Anything that is mine – must be approved by others?
No, it will give me satisfaction – as then no one will be taking it away.
I want my things to be protected by others.
Does it need to be labelled by others?
Is it others who will decide what belongs to me or not?
Can I not say what is mine?
What happened before the event? There were possibilities. Possibilities of being mine. They were not mine – There were only possibilities.
I pursued the possibilities.
Then what happened?
The possibilities were not there – Now it is difficult to say, whether what I pursued was achieved or they just vanished.
Should I just be a facilitator and own nothing? I don’t know. What should I facilitate? I cannot decide that.
After enlightenment, I belong to the moment, nothing belongs to me.
After enlightenment the “my” does not exist.
At the fag end of your logic, you will always find two options, but you will never be able to choose between the two no matter how much you try, this is the end of duality – you are able to observe two option from a third point – this third point is the point of non-duality or the third eye – you can see the two position but will never be able to choose between the two.
You have taken a jump from the two opposite positions to the third positions, now there is no going back.
At enlightenment, the possibilities come to and end, but how the possibilities have come to an end, I cannot say, but if you have arrived, you will be able to corroborate your experience by reading this post.
Possibilities come to an end under two circumstances:
(1) When the changes have happened, when the possibilities have been able to push existence enough and make the required changes in existence thus releasing the pressure – the dream has come true
(2) When the dream will never come true, hence there are no possibilities, the possibilities have not been able to change existence and hence have failed and like a balloon, has burst. The pressure has been completely depleted
You will never known which one has happened. You will never know why the possibilities have come to an end.
Now, there is no driving force to pursue the dream – it has either come true or will never come true. In either of the cases, there is nothing to do – hence no driving force.
If you are able to see both – you are sitting at the third point, a non-dual position thus able to see both the positions, but not able to chose either of them.
Sitting in this third position, you do not know which path is right. How what is the right path? The path that will make the dream come true – we do not know whether the dream will at all come true or has already come true – we are unable to see either.
The mind is always, from the morning, prompting me to act – it shows little possibilities and expects me to create more possibilities from them – but no possibilities can be created by me or created at all.
I have realized that this moment is vast and infinitely heavy and cannot be changed by me, neither should I attempt.
I change along with this moment.
No one can change this moment, it changes on its own – it has its own time.
An ordinary person thinks he is able to change this moment, but creates only possibilities – lives by only possibilities – born because of possibilities in the previous birth – thus rushes to protect them – hence he has no time. He either protects his possibilities or dies.
For an enlightened person, there are no possibilities – no matter how much he tries he cannot generate possibilities.
When possibilities are gone, he is exposed to this moment and goes along with it – he just gets carried by the moment – he changes along with the moment. He now has no responsibility – he lives with complete abandon.
He belongs to this moment.
Onami 